From Surviving to Thriving: Holiday Coping

The holiday season is often portrayed as a time filled with joy, connection, and magical moments. But for many people, this time of year can feel far more complicated. It’s not always like the movies—and that’s completely okay. Acknowledging the mixed emotions that show up during the holiday season is an important first step toward taking care of yourself.

When the Holidays Feel Challenging

There are many reasons the season can be emotionally challenging:

• Shifts in family structure or feelings of loss. Changes in relationships, distance from loved ones, loss or the absence of someone important can all make holiday gatherings feel heavy or challenging.  

• Stress—financial, logistical, and emotional. Gift-giving pressures, travel planning, and packed schedules all while managing your daily demands can take a toll. The expectation to do everything and make everyone happy can create an enormous amount of strain.

• People-pleasing dynamics. The holidays can highlight people pleasing patterns—saying “yes” when you want to say “no,” taking responsibility for others’ emotions, or trying to keep the peace at your own expense. Feeling guilty or worried about other’s being unhappy with you can lead us to make decisions we deeply do not want to and potentially feel resentful.

Recognizing the complex challenges that come with the holiday season allows you to tap into self-empathy rather than judgment.

Coping Strategies for a Healthier Holiday Season

1. Set boundaries ahead of time. Before the season gets busy, take a moment to think about what you’re willing—and not willing—to do. Consider how much time you want to spend at gatherings, what conversations feel off-limits (politics, anyone?), and what traditions you do or don’t want to participate in. Boundaries are promises to yourself that ultimately protect your well-being.

2. Lean on your support system. Talk to the people you trust about your hopes and concerns for the holidays. Let them know how they can support you—whether that’s providing accountability for sticking to your boundaries or simply checking in during stressful moments.

3. Clarify what truly matters to you. Before the invitations and to-do lists pile up, spend some time reflecting on what is most meaningful for you this season. Is it quality time with loved ones? Rest? Religion and/or Spirituality? Certain activities that we associate with holiday season? Once you know your priorities, you can make choices that align with them rather than getting swept up in pressure or obligation.

4. Slow down and be present for what you value. Once you identify what is most important, carve out the space and time to fully engage in your meaningful activities. We want you to be present, unrushed, and able to enjoy what you were most looking forward to headed into the holiday season.

A Final Note

You deserve a holiday season that honors your needs, your boundaries, and your emotional reality. We hope your holiday season can have moments that truly feel restorative and authentic to you.